"Its been emotional"....

This week has been so strange and frankly a bit of a rollercoaster ride. It started off hectic enough as per with the Brothers Grim and I have been exceptionally grumpy due to lack of sleep after Oscar had his MMR. He has been terrible since, crying for fun but then this morning his cot was like a paddling pool of vomit and he hadn't even made a peep *guilty*. Can I also ask why is it when I spray my Chanel perfume it last for a few seconds but if someone barfs on the carpet its smells for a year?! After getting back into Twitter - @AshlieDunn - it took just a few days and I have already had to stop following Rihanna, seriously cant take another weird pic or a "phuck" ...what is that? You have a tattoo of a loaded gun just say F*ck if that's what you mean. I thought we might have a repeat of "Toon Flood" again if the rain had kept up. I would also like to say you couldn't pay me to be at Glasto with the sea of drunk scruffs, 3 days with only a pack of baby wipes for company watching Saga holidays finest "The Stones" ;they were dancing like they had fibreglass clothes on or crabs....I told you, I need to up my sleep and sugar.
 Puddle Ducks

Introduced to a classic.
Barf line even Parker the Duck!


Anyway if you managed to read my blog "My Daddy Cool" you will know that it was also my Dads anniversary on Tuesday. Now this isn't something I have ever... EVER shared with anyone even my husband, I might have occasionally said I cant believe its been X amount of years but apart from that its business as usual. I have always found the "Anniversary" (aka one of the worst days of our lives) a strange concept to mark, as is his birthday, its not like I need to get him a present.... Visiting his grave is another weird one, I actually only live a 2min walk away but I cant remember the last time I was there and certainly have never taken anyone there. I don't mean to mock other peoples way with grief its just not for me, I honestly believe my Dad is with me all the time and I think of him everyday so I don't need to.

However on Tuesday I just couldn't sleep so I got up and rattled off my little Memoir to Dad, I honestly wasn't even going to post it out of respect to my other family in case they found it upsetting but its been 17yrs, I wanted to celebrate him and let some air into the feelings that I normally...well eat, nice and deep back down...I know some people are nodding... So I just post it. 

Then the most amazing things started to happen, people and complete strangers started to share it, started to share lovely comments, started messaging and started texting. Now me, my step mum Caroline and my brother Phil have an incredibly close relationship for obvious reasons but this is still a hard subject for us to all discuss, we like to talk about Dad...but not too much, me especially. However my brother sent the following text to me (with his permission to share) baring in mind we have never marked his anniversary.
"Ash that blog about Dad is AMAZING!!! Thinking of you as I do on this day every year. Love you xxx"
Then my step mum who's not the most technically gifted emailed all our distant family and left me a voicemail (I can never get my phone out of my bag in time!) to say "How lovely it was and it made her cry in a good way". One of the most amazing messages was from a Scottish man, I have never met him but he somehow saw the blog, He knew Dad and fished with him before. I am honestly overwhelmed by all the loveliness, I have shared everything with my brother and (my Dads beloved wife) Caroline, as I said on Facebook for the first time in 17yrs it has felt like a celebration. We all appreciate it so much, Dad really was an incredible man, I'm glad more people know it and he now has his own little spot on the net.
Thanks again
Ash x

This poem sums it up for me.
Do not stand at my grave and weep
I am not there. I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awaken in the morning's hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry;
I am not there. I did not die.


Scones of the fruit variety....

Well its a miserable day, its been an emotional week and baking is my mecca so decided to make one of my staples just because; which is scones. I have made them all different ways but my total favourite has got to be a fruit scone. I normally use GGs (Grandma Max) recipe which is the best around but I couldn't find it and I'm not allowed to ring her before 11am...no not because she is retired and needs her rest because she has probably been up until 4am watching Made in Chelsea, Gossip Girl and Fashion Police to name a few!


My Daddy Cool...

This is a bit of a tough one for me to write but today is the 17th Anniversary of my Dads death, I cant believe it has been that long and it hurts a little like every year does but I can say it gets slightly easier with time. Grief is an odd little journey and although everyone is different for me its a bit like a tightly wound spring inside, as time passe's it becomes more relaxed and less able to just unpredictable explode out...like in a packed M and S; been there. I'm not one to usually share about my Dad because (those of you who have lost someone will know) its others people's faces that get me I can tell they don't know what to do or say even after all this time. There is no right or wrong though and my advice is its always nice to hear a fond memory so share them if someone you know has lost someone, my Dad always said laughter was the best medicine "Cures coughs, colds and scabby holes". Most people think they have the best Dad but I know I did and I wanted to pay homage to him, and share what a fantastic person he was for everything he has given me and continues give to me; this is my version of him. 

My dad was born Alan Alfred Morse on the 3rd December 1949 into a fishing family, he was actually the runt of his school class at first but somehow ended up being 6ft 8in with size 16 feet...maybe school dinners were better then who knows. He went to sea from the then infamous North Shields Quay with my Granddad Pepper as soon as he could walk and I remember him telling me this was where he would spend every single school holiday. His love of fishing and the sea lead him to follow my Granddad into his chosen career, leaving school at 15 and becoming a full time fisherman. He had a great passion for what he did and full confidence that this would be the best route and age just 26 he decided to buy his own boat, saving a large deposit and then borrowing a third of a million pounds to fund it; in 1977 you can imagine this took guts to do.

Fishing was at its best, North Shields in particular was nearly all employed by the quay at the time and my dad would fondly tell me how you could walk straight across the Quays gut as there were so many Fishing boats moored there "Its the closest you will see to a man walking on water". He continued to do well extending his trawler "The Congener" twice becoming the biggest in the fleet at North Shields and several times winning the largest catch. In 1983 I was born followed by my brother in 1987 and we continued tradition by going to sea with him several times, now looking back its hysterical that he took us to Lego land...in Denmark...on his Trawler. Parts of the North Sea Dogger Bank have been know to experience hurricanes, I certainly am no fisherman's daughter suffering from bad sea sickness and crying for 4 solid days until we could see land again. My brother was much more keen, however things were taking a turn for the worst where fishing was concerned and my Dad was adamant that he would not follow in his foot steps to a dying trade. Due to the government and EU regulations fishing was not only a back breaking profession but one you could barley make a living from now. Long before Hugh Fearnly-Whittingstall was shouting about it my Dad became Chairman of the Fisherman's Mission and travelled to the House of Commons to speak about how the government need to help not only the Fishing Industry but the fish. Here is an interesting video made by the BBC of my Dad speaking about the troubles in 1994 before he tragically died at sea (from a massive heart attack) on 25th June 1996 aged 46. 

There weren't many people who didn't know and immediately love Dad especially on the Quay fondly calling him "Big Al", he was also often referred to as a gentle giant which was very true but its not the best idea to start a fire for fun in your bedroom (true story soz again Daddy), then I knew what angry was. Although he was at sea a lot, the times he was home really counted and I will forever have these great memory's and particularly his great sense of humour. I remember him coming to pick us up from school standing in the yard and hoards of children were using him as a climbing frame while he swung them from his enormous arms with delight, or cheering me on at Netball not caring how others stared while he chanted "Ole ole oleee". Spending 3 amazing days every year on the boat with all our friends while the Fish quay festival was going on, my uncle said he was "the only person he knew who could drink 12 pints of snake bite and still pass a breathalyser test". Every year making pancakes for shove Tuesday and never not getting one stuck on the aertex ceiling, he false teeth coming out at a Halloween party while dunking the apple...people thought it was a joke, him teaching me poker and not being allowed on the roller coaster at Disney world because his legs were too long. His love of country music especially Glen Campbell's "Rhinestone Cowboy", I don't care who you are that's a tune. I also chuckle any time I drive past our old house as he hilariously painted the front door the same colour as his boat "Congener Turquoise" I called it..."well there was some left over?!" he said. He was a total character and It is hardly any wonder that there was I believe over 700 people at his funeral.

My Dad would think it a shame what has happened to the North Shields Quay but thankfully it is now getting regenerated and I like to support it, one of my favourite shops is still open in the middle of the quay, an Aladdin's cave called "Whiteys" it sells double yolk eggs, the best bacon going, tuck shop etc cant recommend checking it out enough. I would also love the carry on my Dads "Fish Fight",for anyone else committed please see this link www.fishfight.net  and most importantly pick fish other that Cod and Haddock which are running low.
Obviously I wish my Dad was still here but I know he would be over the moon with Archie and Oscar, already carrying on his legacy by both being on the 100th percentile and Archie age 3 has size UK 1 feet! I will continue to tell them all about their Granddad Alan but I'm waiting until there a bit bigger because as he had a boat Archie is convinced he's a pirate! 
Thanks Dad for it all, miss you so much, love you lots like jelly tots....see you one day.

Ashlie Boo xox

Started young.

Holiday time Kids! Congener.

Fish Quay Festival.

Ceiling Shot!

Always Joking.

Ha haaaa biggest poncho they had...Delighted not!

Enormous feet!

Two of the best men I have ever known. Dad and Grandpa Surrey.


Despicable Mammy.....

Well literally within hours of me saying I wanted a quieter week Oscar decided to keep things fresh and tried to choke to death, I must have looked too relaxed or something. Its always nice to know you can do the Heimlich manoeuvre but I hope I don't ever have to test it out again my heart is still fluttering. Archie has an addiction to stickers at the moment so they are literally on every surface of the house, they looked harmless enough and after being so careful around Oscar with Lego (usually keeping then in the sole of my feet -ouch) I didn't think these would be dangerous. 

Anyhow Oscar thought they would make a nice starter for his breakfast while I was making "my essential, eyes wont fully open until I get have this caffeine brew". It wasn't until 20mins later this sticker must have decided it wouldn't go down but lodge in his throat instead. After he started wheezing like an asthmatic bulldog while turning purple and the frantic back tap taps weren't working I had to rip him out his highchair, looked into his clean mouth then and did a Heimlich. I know I cant believe it either, luckily he just exploded and projectile vomited 9oz Milk, 2 Weetibix and 1 foil frigging dragon fly sticker, partially catching Archie much to his disgust; but only because he was dressed as Batman! It was honestly terrifying and I am so glad that I've done a St Johns Baby course so parents I can recommend even just knowing the basics, it happened it seconds.

I know I will be refreshing my knowledge with the following link as they say "Save a Life"
I have tried Internet food shopping this week and although I think I will use it again as I'd rather eat toenails than take the kids shopping I think I need to get used to it because I know I didn't need breast pads (like ever again), 5 bags of dishwasher salt and I wanted actual Bananas not the borrowers bunch; seriously these look like a baby's hand and are dwarfed by a pepper shaker for £1 

I would also like to personally apologise in advance that the hot spell has now ended until next year due to the fact we have bought a new BBQ, the old ones bottom spectacularly fell out last week spraying chicken drum sticks on to the patio. So it was time to get a new one however the husband thinks it a good investment to go from a small rusty charcoal one to a gas one that is bigger than our oven...burger anyone?
Like baby fingers!

Arch is at home at B and Q

Bigger than the kitchen!

To be honest one of the only reasons I had kids was to have an excuse to see lush kids films, so me and Archie had a lovely morning to ourselves and went to see Despicable Me 2, naturally we had ice cream with popcorn for lunch and the film was really funny. However the cinema did get my back up starting with it costing £17 just for the 2 tickets, I don't even want to get into the prices of the ket but 50ps are cheaper than pear drops. The main thing though that annoyed me is the assigned seating because apart from me has anyone EVER sat in these seats? There is always someone arguing with someone else over the seats and I don't get why when its quiet they still seat people right next to each other, everyone knows a minimum of one seat distance from a stranger is required! Its right awkward to sit down wait for the film and then move along....you might as well lean over and say "you smell like the inside of a mouldy Tupperware box so I'm just bunking over". This brings me onto my next point which is IF they insist on assigned seating, there needs to be a section for rude, noisy and or weird people and think it will be much better.

The last 2 times I have been I'm dumped next to nightmares. Trip one, was a man I'm sure was made of pure play dough and smelled like it, he troughed into his popcorn most of the film like there was gold at the bottom, then swapped to his £60 pick and mix which he saved time on by tipping it directly into his mouth and I swear we heard whole wine gums hitting his throat. At one point I thought he had fallen asleep but snore-breathe was just his normal none eating state. Trip two was yesterday, behind us there was two Mams with 5 kids between them ignoring the kids while they constantly kicked the back of our chairs and went to the toilet 18 times, it was the last straw though when I felt a sticky little hand go into my fresh blow dry and pull a clump. However upon politely turning to say could she stop her 2yr old giving me bald patchs and a heart attack combo I realised they were about 12 and on their phones anyway. They then continued to talk the rest of the film, me and Archie now know when her baby Daddy will be out of prison, what he's like in the sheets oh and she doesn't like corn beef.....I'm just gonna forward this to the Odeon its easier!

The Brothers Grim snack time...only time it is quiet.

Although busy it has been a really nice week particularly enjoying a fab hen doo last night...OK maybe a bit too much. After Cherry Sour shots from the bride to be I was then introduced to a cocktail called No5, Sailor Jerry's, Vanilla Schnapps and Ginger ale =yummy = hung-over mummy...I will never learn. Been wishing it was bedtime since I got up at 7am!

 Obscene but funny Cupcakes!

Its all funny.......until caught!


Rodgerson Wedding #Newtonhall #Birdcage #Amazeballs

*Warning Picture and Praise Heavy post!

It was the wedding of our good friends Dani and Rob on the 31st May at the spectacular Newton Hall. I personally had never heard of the place and in the lead up every time someone asked me where it was they would nod like they knew but I could tell they didn't either! It is actually a country manor house with an amazing conservatory attached to get married in and or have the wedding breakfast with views of the fields in Newton by the Sea and a stones throw from the beautiful Dunstanburgh Castle. www.newton-hall.com


Sanity not included.....

Well this week was chaotic as ever (don't think I will ever say any different) and I'm going to be honest its pushed me to my limits. It all began with Oscar developing Chicken Pox after I thought he had escaped Archie's bout with it being over 2 weeks. At first I was delighted thinking of getting it out of the way as naturally these things strike on special occasions. However his spots looked strange, I still had a return appointment for Archie's eye - yes the one I wasn't going to attend after he accused the 12yr old Dr of pumping! Anyway as appointments seem to be more rare than rocking horse poo, I went and casually asked about Oscar too, he confirmed it was CP and didn't seemed bothered with the 2 4 1 after Archie distracted him by saying "You know what? its typical, every time I come here I,m poorly!" He hasn't quite got context and I think we might now be on some secret "Cause for Concern" at the surgery...hey probably why we cant ever get an appointment...well that and all the plagues of "worried well" there everyday grrr.
Now these 8 spots that might or might not have been CP decided they meant business and by tea time had multiplied, by the next day I could barley see my child. It must have been sore because he was off his grub and he wouldn't have his naps...if your a parent you will be quickly in the picture why I was starting to lose it, nap time is basically the only thing that will get you through the day. Not only that but CP is a taboo subject, now my friends with older ones were banging down the door for a snog off Oscar but the ones with babies were saying "lets give it a month or three.." so playmates were scarce this week and we were housebound! Even a trip to GG's (Grandma Max aka Great Grandma or Gossip Grandma!) and some sea air didn't stop the constant whiny cry, which turned into a night of none stop crying and more and more spots turning up; also including me and the husband having a few... we will call them conversations about whether 39c temp needed A and E or if it could be Measles. To say I wanted to tear all my hair out by Wednesday morning pretty much describes the situation and still I'm house bound. So before I had a bottle of Pinot for brekkie I got inventive; we have done crafts (again the damage to my sanity is yet know), carpet picnics, tipee party's and went for a walk to the haven for an ice cream. Even though Ozzie was still getting spots on the soles of his feet (not kidding) he was now sleeping and this was definitely the turning point, but having been one of the people to say of CP "get it while you can" I don't think that anymore, wait until bribery, sweets and comics can be fully enforced.
As he was no longer infectious we decided to take our Caravan "Dolly" for a trip to the lakes and watch our friend do the "Great North Swim" on lake Windermere; nothing better for frayed tempers, poorly kids than a confined space. Oh and no wifi or mobile signal, I mean I like being in the middle of no where but I want to connected as well...people live there what do they do, Tin can and string?! In truth it was really nice to get away, Archie particularly loves playing with his friends until dark and I just like loads of wine, no housework and the new Dexter box set. Unfortunately the parking terrible so we didn't get to witness the swim and opted for a walk then a spot of lunch. Now I am physically allergic to proper exercise seriously I have the lung capacity  of someone in a long-term coma but I don't mind a nice stroll, take in the scenery and pub lunch at the end but the husband thinks he is Ray Mears, so when he suggested this "light" 2mile walk near Grasmere I should have been worried. However he was clever knowing full well I would be distracted just by the mention of Grasmere and the fact I could get copious amounts of "Sarah Nelsons Gingerbread"... Ive already had 3 pieces just writing this.
So we bash on and at first it was nice, few cows, rivers and that. After a bit of an incline, the people are looking serious -you know they have waterproof pants on and two walking poles-  but still he promises its only a bit more. So we go up another level and I'm getting a bit out of puff but we stop for some gingerbread and I don't want to be outdone by my 3yr old who is leading the way up frankly this now mountain. So we go up a bit more, I literally cant breathe now and every time no "mountain rescue types" are around I am threatening to cave the husbands skull in... this thing was just never going to end every new section was a false top. I then spy a huge mast and the thought of 3G got me 4 more metres up but there was still no sodding Facebook or texts. Its now at this horrible stage now where you cant turn back as it will be longer so the only option is to go up, I just randomly start telling people now that I only like walking on FLAT ground but no one took me seriously even after I threatened to rolly polly all 3 rocky miles down! At some point I become delirious and float to the top, where I nearly kill someone from laughing at my comment that "It must be a mountain because it has a tarn!" ...I now know it was just a puddle. I thought the worst was over but we were by the husbands own admission a bit lost and I wanted to just get to the pub so we started making our own route down through streams, rock faces and bogs, it was mental. After we got to the bottom and started talking to some serious walkers they recon we did 6mile mostly up hill! All I know is that it took nearly 4hrs, I think one of my toenails is gonna drop off but I am mega proud of Archie who didn't complain once.
Its funny though because just when you think you are having a bad week you see someone with triplet boys and 2 girls all under about 7, in a tent he he heeee! So after this exhaustion and no Facebook is it any wonder I thought Fathers Day was next week AND I didn't even know that Kim K had her baby....here's to a calmer week ahead.
Happy Fathers day to all the great Daddy's, Granddads and father figures out there!
Ash x
That's ma boy.

Knackered and NO WIFI?!



Its not a tarn, I asked.
Get me out of here!
 New Route!
Well deserved.
Only card left.


"Kings fight for empires, madmen for applause" John Dryden

I have recently been enthralled in the latest "mouth hung open" actions of our local council North Tyneside, by threatening a legal challenge to prevent the merger of the local comprehensive Priory Primary and the local Private School Kings, joining to make an academy in Tynemouth.
For those not up to date: Both schools are rated "Outstanding" however due to the recent recession Kings who charge £10k a year have seen a drop in 50% of pupil admissions, it would have seen numbers fall even further and like La Sagesse in Newcastle would have had to close forever. Priory Primary has the opposite problem being one of few state Primary schools rated "Outstanding" by ofsted in the area, it is therefor massively over subscribed. So it was decided to merge the two becoming a "hybrid" of both schools, for the local community which will be funded not by the local council but by the Department of Education and will be run independently.

Kings is one of many private schools around the country who have applied to become an Academy but this is the first ever to include a state primary school so it will not only be a one of a kind school but a historic moment also. The plans were announced last September and it was "full steam ahead" however it is now in jeopardy as Labour has recently been put into power at our last local election and the newly appointed Mayor Norma Redfearn seems to enjoy devils advocate and wasting our local tax payers money; the council its self is also one of only two in the country who have admitted to being against Academy's. 
The story has even made the national news, see link below.

Now from the outset I should say a few things:

1. Both my brothers attended the "Old" Kings school, I myself didn't get in due to mild dyslexia and didn't pass the entrance exam. Thankfully I went to the marvellous St Thomas Moore and actually ended up with better GCSE results than both of them...make of that what you will.

2.Due to the above I have to say I am against fee paying education, I think "Outstanding" education should be available to all no matter what your address, religion or bank balance is.

3. This wont even apply to me until September 14, as my oldest son is only 3, I therefor have not yet become obsessed with league tables or considered a fake address next to the "best" schools or taught him Mandarin,...you know for a competitive edge.

4. Although I used to live in Tynemouth I don't anymore and will probably be just out of the catchment anyway.

So having said all of that I can still only see this as a positive move for the community and as it was consulted with parents of both schools  90% of them also agree. I'm sure there were some understandably upset parents and pupils of the "old" Kings school but there is still a lot of other private education in the area should you be able to afford it for your child. I'm sure there are parents and pupils in other local schools worried thinking "Will our school suffer as a result?" but as its not going to be funded by the local authority it wont take any funding away, so If the merger is allowed I can only see that it would make breathing space in class sizes for everyone.

I am really annoyed by this legal challenge not just because of what it could mean but its the huge cost of tax payers money that will be involved. NTC a council who already somehow need to save £40million have stuck their nose in at the last minute. It is in my view very irresponsible of the council to object  at such a late stage in the plans as it was only ever going to cause mass anxiety. It is only weeks until children break up for summer, with such uncertainty; can you imagine having a little one starting reception or a big one about to start their GCSE year and not knowing where they are going to be?! It has been badly thought through by incompetent management in the council and is at best petty. Ironic that the Kings school motto is "Moribus Civilis" meaning "Behave Properly".

This great weather spell has only made me worse as if we fancy a park day trip there is nowhere decent in the local area. "Dog crap Park" aka Northumberland Park ironically 2mins away from these schools is an absolute disgrace; dirty, broken and overgrown. There are no longer ducks to feed, no cafĂ© or toilets either and it has been public knowledge that flashers and other perverts are lurking around. After a relative of mine was approached by a disturbing man last year while walking with a pram I wouldn't dream of going there alone again never mind with my children. Myself and my friends much prefer the fantastic Ridley Park or Morpeth Park both in Northumberland or Marine Park or Bede Park both in South Tyneside, even the nice park in Whitley Bay is not in the same league as these and always overcrowded on any day its not raining.
I would erg the council and Norma Redfearn to allow this much needed merger to go ahead and spend the money that would be wasted in a legal challenge on Northumberland Park or potholes or paving or free parking at Rake Lane or any free parking. I honestly haven't met one person against. Tynemouth has been described as a jewel in North Tyneside's crown, let this merger happen and be the jewel in Tynemouth's crown. 
If you support this and want to get involved please:
1.Sign the online petition below and encourage your partners and family to as well.
2. Facebookers, join the page below for all the latest updates and other ways to help or get involved.
"Parents supporting Kings Priory Merger"
3. Write a letter to the council and or Mayor, there is help and a template on the Facebook page if you wish.
Ash x


Language Barrier....

Well this week started with the husband going offshore, now I remember when  I used to not mind this, no one to cook for - he needs a 2 course meal with some form of meat and half a loaf of bread, I like a dish of cornflakes for tea- and the TV to myself. However now kids are in the mix I really do think on these occasions as well as all school holidays alcohol should be provided on the NHS. The house literally could have been condemned by the time he returned, there was no more than an old jar of pickle some questionable baked beans and a dribble of milk in the fridge; as for ironing, I've decided to just wear things smooth for a while.
Not only was I solo but Archie has decided to fully develop his language skills this week, starting with a trip to the GP. He had a nasty left over Chicken pox on his eye so I took him for a check up just to be safe, now as he the very young Dr was concerned he called the RVI for some advice. Whilst quietly on hold someone outside loudly scraped a chair *parhhhp*as soon as the Dr put the phone down Archie leans in and says "I know you have pumped!" So although he has a return check up next week we wont be attending that anymore. This weather has been glorious and we have taking full advantage of it seeing friends in the garden or park, it must be a stage for the boys because all I could hear was poo this and tiddler that, to be honest if I hear another "poo face" I might grow a "tiddler head". Naturally my son being him had to raise the anti by very loudly exclaiming "Oh F*cking Hell my coats stuck" ...now don't get me wrong the air is blue in our house even my 76yr Grandma says the F word but we have been careful around little ears. So I ignored it but when he decided to announce it at nursery pick up and the ground didn't do its part by swallowing me whole the naughty step has been well worn in this week, I just pray it works, although this morning I heard Archie shout IT at his brother and before I could even go through he shouted "I'm on the naughty step Mam"......Hmmmm
Oscar isn't one to be outdone though and has been particularly "challenging" this week. Apart from refusing to walk -to be fair he is waited on hand and foot by his big brother so why would he?- and thinking it was hilarious to burst every balloon tipping his head back with an evil laugh at a 1st birthday party, making several other children cry there is also NO limit to what this child will put in his mouth. Crawling faster than light he has this week alone, licked a toilet brush, chewed a pink crayon, eaten 3 handfuls of soil, some grass, petals and several tissues. He also wanted to end the week on a high, so yesterday after he came out of the paddling pool we made the mistake of not putting a nappy back on him while emptying the pool about 2 nano seconds later Archie comes running, "Oscar is eating his own poo!" and yes there he was with fistfuls about the say "Bon Appetite" *Dry heave*
I think the week has really taken its toll though or I'm pretty sure I'm getting early onset Alzheimer's after I terrified myself  trying to text a friend the word "Only", I couldn't even think what it looked like never mind spell it "ownelly, ownaly, ownnn", I later was frantically scurrying around in the swimming bag for my shoes "Um the ones you have on?!"... and finally driving to the supermarket without the kids after 20mins (don't worry its not a Jeremy Kyle story) I realised that I didn't  actually have to listen to the Gruffalo audio book. I'm sure some sleep will help but while I'm on can everyone stop trying to spoil "Game of Thrones Finale" I haven't had time to watch it and its on every buggers lips and facebook profile...I know someone crucial has died!!
All in all this week has been very enjoyable, its so easy to entertain little ones and for adults to have fun when the weather is good, everything is better when the sun is out-FACT. We have had a few picnics, a lovely little 1st birthday party which I made a Mickey cake for, ice creams, BBQ and a fab day up at the Grandparents who live on the beach; my Granddad really is Archie best bud! Also for the little brothers birthday ( he's 20 but I feel sick as its the first person I have ever said "I remember the day you were born like yesterday") we had a lovely family breakfast at Frankie's and Benny's or as my Grandma calls it "Ben and Jerry's" It must be a tough one though because Archie calls it "Mr Frank and Dennis" either way I think the poor waitress was glad to see the back of us rowdy 12. To be fair we were a bit over excited as my Auntie is an Air Hostess in First Class and last week on her flight to Hong Kong they were told that the entire "British Lions" team were on the board! she got us a fully signed menu and a specially made head rest cover so that's something for the memory box....or Ebay. Oh and best of all I ditched being a Scummy Mummy for a girly night out/catch up with the work girls, aka Slunts...if I tell you why they are called that I will have to kill you!
Lets hope the summer lasts.
Ash x
Best Great Granddad Ever!

Mickey Mouse Clubhouse.
Uncle Pip.